Thursday, June 3, 2010

The word "love" and the word "relationship"

"That for which we find words is something already dead in our hearts. There is always a kind of contempt in the act of speaking." ~Friedrich Nietzsche

Or writing ;) Words, oh words, how they can divide us. So I'm going to cast out far beyond the ends of division and words. I'm going to try to say that Love is Love. And Relationships are relationships. Two separate things!

When it comes down to it, for me it seems there are three big stages of a romantic relationship. 1) finding each other - friendship, 2) engaged to be married, 3) marriage [with marriage vows].

Now I'm cheating a bit and going to say that 'relationships' is not really the topic of this posting. The meatier topic is Love. And to me, Love means forever. Love doesn't mean "relationship". Relationships can change, relationships are here in the field of time and require agreement and participation of two people.

What I really mean by love in this discussion is "unconditional love". Unconditional love requires and necessitates "unconditional forgiveness". I've talked about this in previous blog postings. Love, to me, is timeless. This aspect of "unconditional Love" often seems confused by society. So I'm going to post a series of quotes to try and point in the general direction of what I mean by unconditional love...

If you Love a mountain because it does not argue with you... If you Love a tree because it does not argue with you... If it is possible that I can say a few words that cause you to "stop loving me", then it's probably the meaning of the word "Love" that we argue about... (~RoundSparrow)

“To be able to say how much you love is to love but little.” ~Petrarch

“In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities.” ~János Arany

“Love is born with the pleasure of looking at each other, it is fed with the necessity of seeing each other, it is concluded with the impossibility of separation.” ~Josi Marti (1835-1895)

“In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing.” ~Mignon McLaughlin

“Love is most nearly itself When here and now cease to matter.” ~T.S. Eliot

“Love works in miracles every day: such as weakening the strong, and stretching the weak; making fools of the wise, and wise men of fools; favouring the passions, destroying reason, and in a word, turning everything topsy-turvy” ~Marguerite De Valois

“True love is knowing a person's faults, and loving them even more for them.” ~Mandy Hampton

“You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly.” ~Sam Keen

“Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less.” ~Julius Gordon

What is love? Not the Ego, Knowledge, Appearance of the person... it is their spirit, and it is that which I seek to share. Let's try this quote to really shake up the realization:

“Ego is a social institution with no physical reality. The ego is simply your symbol of yourself. Just as the word "water" is a noise that symbolizes a certain liquid without being it, so too the idea of ego symbolizes the role you play, who you are, but it is not the same as your living organism." ~Alan Watts

And again, to me, Love is not the same as a Relationship. As I see it, Relationships take two, relationships take time, and many more things that could be said about Relationships...

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