Confusion over love is not new. Some well-meaning people who think I must be "doing something wrong" just seem to not understand that love has many depths (shallow and deep), and many different forms. I'm not here looking for a one night stand or casual friends, although friends are always welcome. I am offering and seeking to share a much deeper and richer form of love. In this current society, it is more rare - and considered difficult...
This deeper form of love is time-consuming. It will require me to grow. I will endure sorrow of loss and pain of compassion. That mutual love will have substantial passion. That passion will sometimes take the wrong expressions, and working together to resolve that will require time and patience.
Working together, us/we/unity. That means time and effort. It can't always be scheduled, it can't always be deferred - and not all conflicts can be resolved. We do our best, we share our true selves, and we mend our errors as best we can. Each tick of the clock is a new opportunity.
Heaven and hell are described as forever. Heaven is of unending time. It is not eternal. Eternal is beyond time. The concept of time shuts out eternity. It is over the ground of that deep experience of eternity that all of these temporal pains and troubles come and go. There is a Buddhist ideal of participating willingly and joyfully in the passing sorrows of the world. Wherever there is time, there is sorrow. But this experience of sorrow moves over a sense of enduring being, which is our own true life.
Shiva's dance is the universe. In his hair is a skull and a new moon, death and rebirth at the same moment, the moment of becoming. In one hand he has a little drum that goes tick-tick-tick. That is the drum of time, the tick of time which shuts out the knowledge of eternity. We are enclosed in time. But in Shiva's opposite hand there is a flame which burns away the veil of time and opens our minds to eternity.
Shiva is a very ancient deity, perhaps the most ancient worshiped in the world today. There are images from 2000 or 2500 B.C., little stamp seals showing figures that clearly suggest Shiva.
In some of his manifestations he is a really horrendous god, representing the terrific aspects of the nature of being. He is the archetypal yogi, canceling the illusion of life, but he is also the creator of life, its generator, as well as illuminator.
There are plenty of people who are happy in their lives. Great for them. I get to live my life. I'm not unhappy, I'm seeking something that is in my heart, something eternal. I can do it alone, but I choose not to cancel out life - I choose to embrace it. It is about discovering.
Look inside your own heart... can we share? A form of love that you have never known, never experienced; nor have I. It will involve knowing enough about life to embrace the unknown and not yet solved. I stand before you saying: see that mountain in the distance, do you wish to climb with me?